Today is Tuesday
by fireflyjunction
Summary: Will Erik realize how ditzy Christine is before its too late? Will Raoul prove himself a worthy foe? Will anyone reveiw this crazy story?


_**Author's Note:** This is for a friend of mine who has been endlessly bothering me for a R/C story. Normally, there's no way that I would ever allow that to happen but I found a nice way to twist things so I could. I hope you other R/Cers out there enjoy this…_

_**Disclaimer:** Don't own any of the characters and honestly, most of them I wouldn't want anyway!_

This story begins in the Down Once More sequence, starting with the trio while Raoul is at the Phantom's mercy…

"And my life is over…"

"To late for tears and useless pity!"

"Hey look, do you mind! I am trying to comfort my fiancé and I'm sure she can't hear me if you keep singing over me like that." Raoul angrily muttered to the crazy man next to him.

"And I should listen to you because...?" the phantom sneered, tightening the lasso around the Vicomte's neck.

"Because I love her!" He replied, smiling his dashing smile at Christine who was standing on the shore looking utterly confused. Her immediate smile was cut short as Erik jerked the noose tighter.

"That's too bad because _I _love her," Erik snarled in his ear.

"You do!" Christine breathlessly exclaimed. Raoul couldn't help but groan as her brilliant smile lit the room once again. "You never told me that!"

"I had hoped you would have figured it out on your own by now my darling," Erik sighed, wondering once again how someone so beautiful could be so simple-minded. "I did give you plenty of hints."

"Oh Raoul, isn't it wonderful!" she continued, completely missing his gentle insult. "The Angel of Music loves me!"

"Of course he does!" The Viscount shouted angrily. "Why the hell do you think we'd be here if he didn't!"

"Don't yell at her!" The phantom warned, tightening the noose yet again. "I won't have you making her unhappy!"

"I'm sorry darling!" Raoul called out almost gaily.

"Its alright Raoul, I forgive you." He didn't bother to hide his smirk from the phantom as Christine smiled at him yet again. "Isn't Erik such a gentleman, always looking out for me!"

"Erik? Your name is Erik?" Raoul asked the phantom.

"Yes, what of it?"

"Oh nothing. It's just that I just finished reading this marvelous book that's all about how peoples names affect their personality and the way people perceive them," he excitedly informed his captor.

"What does it say about Erik's name, Raoul!" Christine exclaimed, inching closer to the water.

"Well, I don't remember it exactly but it was something about the name Erik being abrupt and highly masculine," he paused as the phantom snorted. "He would be a powerful person, though quick to anger and extremely possessive of anything considered his own."

"Oh that's amazing!" Christine cooed.

"I am sure the boy merely made that up to amuse you and to distract you from your decision, my dear," he replied, angry with the boy but delighted at receiving her smile.

"What does it say about your name Raoul!" She happily cried, completely ignoring him.

"Raoul is a perfect balance between masculine and feminine elements, with a charming manner and a brave heart." He proudly replied, puffing out his chest.

"Oh that sounds so romantic!" She swooned prettily. "But I think poor Erik deserves a better name because he's very romantic too!"

"He is?" Raoul asked just as the noose jerked tight once again.

"Of course he is!" She pouted. "Look at all the pretty candles and his swan bed is absolutely beautiful!"

"You sleep in a swan?" He asked, rolling his eyes over towards the slightly embarrassed opera ghost.

"You are in no position to comment as you still sleep with your teddy." Erik snapped wishing this would all be over sooner rather than later.

"No one is listening to me!" Christine sulked, stomping her dainty foot angrily.

"I'm sorry my darling," Erik soothed, the Viscomte being unable to answer at the moment. "What was it you were saying before we so rudely interrupted you?"

"You need a better name, Angel!"

"Look, how about you decide your own fate before you start messing around with my name?" He murmured impatiently.

"But you said you were named Erik by accident and only kept it because…"

"I know what I said but…" Erik began only to be cut off by the boy.

"Don't interrupt her, it only makes her mad." Raoul commented as Christine began turning a bright shade of red.

"As I was saying!" Christine screeched. "What was I saying?" she looked around confused.

"Erik needs a new name!" Raoul called out helpfully. "How about Andrew?"

"You just be quiet, Fop!" Erik hissed in his ear. Luckily Christine remained completely oblivious to his rising temper and blathered on contentedly.

"No it really doesn't suit him. How about Jonathan? Or maybe something shorter like Jack?"

"Whatever you like is fine with me, Christine!" Raoul gallantly replied.

"Enough!" Erik yelled, startling poor Christine and bringing tears to her eyes. "You try my patience! Make your choice!"

"Do I have to?" she asked pitifully.

"Yes, you have to!" He snarled, lost in his madness.

"Alright, I choose…" she childishly fidgeted, clearly trying to make a good choice. "Vincent!"

"What?" both of her suitors asked in unison.

"You don't like it?" she asked Erik, looking completely crushed. "I thought it would make you happy."

For the first time ever, Erik took a good look at the girl. Yes, she was breathtakingly beautiful, even after the hell she had been forced to endure at his hand. Yes, she sang like one of God's own angels. Yes, she made most bricks look brilliant. Looking into her vacant eyes, he made his decision.

"I adore it my darling," he soothed, smiling comfortingly. She smiled back at him as he gently untied the stunned Viscomte. "Just as I adore you."

She blushed at his complement. "Do you really?"

"Always," he whispered as he slowly walked towards her. "But now you must go with Raoul."

"Why?" she whimpered, looking up at him with a lost puppy expression.

"Because today is Tuesday."

"It is!" she asked excitedly. At his nod she ran out to Raoul in the water. "Raoul! Guess what!"

"What?" he asked, happy to be able to breath normally once again.

"It Tuesday!" she breathlessly exclaimed.

"No its not," he began before Christine angrily interrupted him.

"Yes it is! Vincent said so!" Looking to the phantom he saw the man make shooing motions with his hands.

"Oh, okay," he agreed. "Well, since it is Tuesday, I must take you to the park. Goodbye Erik…er Vincent!"

"Oh Raoul! A trip to the park would be lovely!" She cried delighted. "Goodbye Vincent!"

With that the pair turned and left the poor phantom in his lonely labyrinth, who was never so thankful for silence in his entire life!

_**AN:** With any luck this will be the one and only R/C piece I ever write! Sorry E/C ers! Don't flame me! Or wait, if you flame, at least you're reviewing… Flame away, just Review!_

P.S. In case you couldn't guess, this one is for Vincent. I'll get you converted one day you fop lover! XOXO!


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